.ME.

i came across this test in my friend's blog. out of curiosity, i took the test. here is the result.

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education:
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

.PA.

i went to the PA chalet cum seniors' farewell at pasir ris today. knew that you guys had planned a lot of activities but we were too lazy and tired to go out and play the games. in the end, the games were cancelled and we played our favourite hobbies - weeleng's mini mahjong and cards. what's new right? anyway, the BBQ was scary. they ordered mountains of food which can last them for 3 days and 2 nights. the BBQ was still going on when i left around 10pm. haha.. happy eating guys and thanks for the gifts and efforts to organise the event.

i am shagged but i refused to sleep although i need to wake up at 830am tomorrow morning for my first guide activity after As. woah!!!! finally i am into guide again. wonder how is their cf preparation? have not taken a look at their proposals and work schedules yet. hope it is a job well done because i have high expectations on everything. i think i demand a lot from the guides but i am not sure if i have demanded too much. the angel in me keeps telling me that it is for their own good so that they can be better guides and seniors and most importantly, DESTROY the wrong impressions everyone has on guides. on the other hand, the devil tells me that i am asking for trouble and more work to do. hai... i choose to believe in the angel to keep me going. let me be a nice madam tomorrow. =)

"just still swimming, swimming, swimming"

.fruitful shopping.

after a week of mad rush, i have finally completed my prom shopping. yeah!!! all thanks to jieFAT and S14 people. today was the happiest shopping trip i had so far for the past few days. one, it was the shopping companion, who is my bestie, jieFAT. two, i was shopping for my favourite items which are accessories, shoes and bags. three, i had very good bargains today. i spent $65 for a pair of nice heels and a bag from isetan and taka respectively. that's way below my budget. yeah!! that's worth celebrating because i am short of cash now because of all the prom shopping. that's why i need to minimize cost as low as possible. since i am done with my shopping, it starts the next saving and spending cycle again. i need to start saving again because i saw many pretty stuff that i want to buy. let's go shopping again after christmas okay jieFAT? we are each other's lucky stars. =)

i was very angry on my way from amk to orchard today. this family, consists the husband, wife, 3 children of which 2 are below 5 years old and the other is just a baby and a maid. the baby was crying and wanted her mummy. so the maid had to carry the baby to the wife. during that process, the husband was reprimanding the maid in the public on the mrt!! " so slow, so slow." that's all he could say. he was just sitting there, observing the maid and doing nothing. that's what i called, talk but no action. if he really felt that the maid was slow, walk to the maid, carry the baby to his wife himself. come on! maids are humans too. it is such an awful scence to scold anyone in public. they have self esteem too. argh!!! spare a thought for others. that's the lesson we should all learn today.

"treat others in the way you want to be treated in"

.sick.

went over to jiefang's house to slack today. i am soooo sorry kns. i am seriously tired after all the walking and i need a day to recharge. sorry sorry... back to the main topic. i actually slacked my whole afternoon at her house again. we din do anything except chatting. it has been sometime since we last met. i guess the previous time we met was during the preparation for prelims. when was that? hmm... what was our conversation about? anything and everything under the sun. that's what i love about friends. you dont have to meet up everyday but there are endless topics to talk about. =)

i am suddenly disgusted by the upcoming event. it is a competitive event as quoted from my friend. come to think about it, it is damn true. we hope to dress in a special and unique way to stand out among all. we pray and pray all days and nights that nobody will wear the same attire as us on the same day. element of surprise? stunning? to me, what's most important is to enjoy yourself there. just feel good and you will natuarally look good. hmm... some may find this sentence contridicts my previous entry. WATEVER. I DONT CARE. i am in such a lousy mood these few days. my moods swing like nobody's business. crap! i am totally disgusted by everything now. i should just tear it, go to sleep and forget that it exists.

i feel bad. not guilty. there is a difference btw the 2 feelings. i should be nice. or rather, i should try to be nice.

"it is just me, myself and i"

.fcuk.

caution: dont bother to read. i am just venting my anger in this entry. it will be a waste of your precious time to read the following.

ARGH!

i am so freaking pissed off now. argh! today is just the wrong day. exhausted? burnt out? watever. i dun care. i am so sick and tired of everything now. it does not seem as fun as it was to me now. all the walking and walking and walking, queueing outside the damn few pathetic fitting rooms, trying out to see how it looks like on me, thinking whether it fits my budget not. what the crap!!!! why so many things??? i am just giving myself more work to do during the holidays. i am supposed to enjoy myself. wouldn't it be nice if this is just like any normal trip. buying things i like, i will use very often, pampering myself, coming back home with bags after bags. i hate it when it is a fruitless trip and i had 3 in a row. DAMN! i hate it! irritating. getting so freaking irritated by everything. throwing my temper at home. freak! why am i losing it again. argh!!!!! i hate it! can someone just give me a tight slap on my face to wake me up. welcome to the reality girl. you do not get everything you want everytime. face the truth! stressed out? yes, i guess i am because i hate last min work. i am a planner. i need to get everything in place and ready ASAP so that i can feel secure. now, everything is screwed up. everything is behind my schedule. freaking pissed off. i have no more time left. i will be packed for the next few days. come on, i have other committments okay. yesyes, trying to act busy right? watever. i dun care. i am just busy. accept it or not and it is none of my business. i am losing my patience at everything. you push me a slightly more and i will explode. i am so pissed off. pissed off pissed off. pissed off. pissed off. pissed off. why am i getting so damn angry over such a small matter? shit me lah. i am such a lousy freak. i dont deserve to live. kill me now. quick, pass me a gun. irritating!!!!! i am thinking if i should just bycott it and join them after it. damn it. why on earth will i think of this?

ARGH!

"GET LOST"

.leg breaking week.

it is coming. oh my! i din know it is such a troublesome affair. i need to get it done by tmr cos i dun have anymore time to spare. tmr out, thurs rest, fri hair saloon, sat buy stuff, sun out with sis, mom PA chalet cum seniors' farewell, tues guides, wed rest and thurs BIG DAY. oh my!!!!!! my legs are breaking. =(

"pass me some ice"

.clear out.

i dont believe in horoscope at all. i read them for pleasure. however, today's prediction for my horoscope hits bull eye! it mentions about having a lot of work to do today and wanting to get them all done right at the first time. if not, i will not be able to sleep tonight.

what did i do today? CLEAN MY MESSY ROOM!!!! yes, yes, that is what i did today. i tied my hair up, pinned my fringe, got a rag from my dad, went to the toilet to get a pail and off to work. i cleared all my JC stuff and packed them into boxes. i cleaned every single dark corner in my room. i used the wet rag and polished every single furniture until they were sparkling clean. my parents were shocked when they returned home in the evening. i was packing before they left the house and i was still packing when they returned. hmmm.. i wonder how big my room is. finally at 7pm, everything was in order. i make sure that i had covered my entire room and got off my dirty and smelly clothes. yucks!

i was looking through the letters i have received and it brought back many memories, some of which i refuse to remember but it kept flashing across my mind. it's sad that i have lost contact with some of my friends. some of my letters have turned yellow but i refuse to throw them away. when do i become a sentimental person? i think i still have all the letters my first pen pal wrote to me. he was my neighbour then. unfortunatley, i have lost contact with him after he has moved to somewhere else in spore. we would see each other when we attended school at the nearby kindergarden but we would post the letters into the other party's letterbox. what an ineffective way! why did i do such a thing in the past? i was talking to jaihui and goi about christmas cards last night. it really warms my heart to receive a card from my friends in this technology era. it means a lot to me. hmmm... should i send cards this year?

"busy and hectic. but i am loving it"

.it's the END.

i was thinking on my bed last night. strangely, i could not sleep. i was not feeling butterflies in my stomach. come on! it's a afternoon chem MCQ paper. if i should be nervous, it would be the night before my most dreaded subject, econs. anyway, it is my last time wearing a school uniform today. i dun think there will be any chance for me to put on that grey stuff anymore. it could be the last time i will be seeing all the Nj peeps unless we all make an effort to keep in touch. it will be my last time having an exam in school. oh my!!! so many last times but i sure wont miss any of them. finally, the day i have been waiting for is finally here.

looking back at my JC journey, i dont know if i should cry or laugh. i did not want to get into NJ. it was not my ideal JC. luckily, i have encouraging parents. "2 years will be over before you know" how true it is. i dont feel like 2 years have passed. have i matured? what have i gained? more friends? more knowledge? did i enjoy myself? would things be better if i were somewhere else?

04S16- a class i will always remember. getting into trouble with the school admin, all the after school activity which was EATING, all the gatherings, and the mystery unsolved. i still dont know who that person is. maybe it is better to leave it as a mystery. let's not hurt our friendship because of that. =) fate brought us fun and laughter and then tears and curses. we were separated. it was hard for me initially to mix with 04S14 because i had to start everything brand new with people i have not seen in my entire life, except for goi, god, tiong, HQ and ah ma. at times, i was in dilemmas. (i guessed only a few of you know what that means) i was neither here nor there. i felt like a lost sheep. =( the bond gets stronger with the torturous PW sessions, endless chit chats with heng, inspiring lessons from yong.. and a year had passed. the second year was a mad rush. all i could rmb was lecture tests, assignments, make up lessons esp tek's, tests (did i mention that alrdy). we still have fun! the trcher's day celebrations, today, playing bingo during contact....

i am guilty of not being a good friend, a good daughter and a good sister during this stressful period. i felt bad when my mum told me she could not slp the night before my morning paper because she was afraid she would overslp. if she failed to wake me up in the morning, i would be SCREWED. during the first few papers, my parents would offer to lock the door for me when i left the house. they dont do that for me on normal days. i could see their worries and hope for me. i feel loved. they dun give me any pressure. i just want to do them proud for once. i have never done anything they can be proud of me before. i had failed them once 2 years ago and i dont want history to repeat itself. i felt guilty when i just closed my door and studied in my room everyday. when they came in to check on me, i would give them the "dont disturb me" look. why on earth did i do that? moreover, i totally lost contact with my friends. minimum interaction with the outside world. no gatherings, no outings. just good luck msgs via SMS. we r not even communicating using the internet!!! i had totally become a nerd. ARgh! i deserved to be punished!

"it just keeps flowing"

.the battle is coming.

it's coming, it's coming. i feel like killing myself now. so many things to revise within the next few days. see, i dont even bother to count the remaining days i have to stuff all the necessary knowledge into my pee brain. someone save me!!!



i was talking to my sis on the phone the other day. she suggested to go shopping last weekend. i was like DUH! i am in the midst of my preparation for A levels and she had to go this to tempt me. argh!!!! what a thoughtful sister i have. haha... but i know that she is trying to help me to relax cos she knows that her little sister here gets quite tensed up before exams.



keep it going, girl and to everyone. it will be here soon and before you know, it's over. so come on! keep the spirit high and alive. think of your post exams plans to motivate yourself. or maybe indulge in comfort food, like CHOCOLATES to make studying less boring. work hard people!

"they need to bleed to defeat me"